Friday's Quote

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire.

If you did what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don't know something,

for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times

during those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations,

because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge,

because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes,

they will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you're tried and weary,

because it means you've made a difference.

It's easy to be thankful for the good things.

A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who

are also thankful for the setbacks.

Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.

Find a way to be thankful for your troubles,

and they can become your blessings.

~ Author Unknown

As we approach Thanksgiving here in the US, what else can you be thankful for?

eWomen Glow Event

I have just come back from the eWomen Glow Project in Campbell, CA and I feel inspired.

The speakers were funny, poignant and candid about their lives, their pasts, their failures, their hardships and their successes.

These are the things I took from the three speakers, Sandra Yancey, Barbara Rubin, and Marilyn Tam:

1.  Evaluate who in my life is serving my dream(s) and who is taking me away

2.  Create space in my life so that something new can show up.  If I am always so booked or busy, there is no room for the Universe to deliver something new

3.  Show up expecting success

4.  My fortune and future will be created by and with those I am yet to meet

5.  Lighting someone else's candle does not diminish my own light

6.  The Universe never gives us something early...nor for that matter does it give us something late, it is always right on time

7.  'Fine' is one of the most destructive words in the English language, because most often when we answer we are 'fine' we are anything but fine

8.  JUMP!

9.  Embrace money

Sandra spoke of the importance of having good girlfriends in her life that she can lean on, and I left today's event feeling all filled up - the same way I feel when I have spent time with my best girlfriends.  I didn't know more than 3-4 people at the event, but there was something about the energy in the room that has left me inspired.

Here's to the power and importance of having great girlfriends in our lives!

Sunset

My favorite time of day is sunset.  While I like sunrise, I am not a morning person, so I don't see them as frequently. 

I love how every sunset is unique - depending on where I am in the world, the weather conditions and the time of the year.  I particularly love when the sun's setting colors are reflected on buildings or clouds - as in the photo above (taken June 2005, Wellington, New Zealand) or the photo below (taken January 2008, Queenstown, New Zealand).

Sunsets are the one thing in nature that will really have me physically stop in my tracks and pause to admire them.  I will stop and smell roses while I am walking (or other nature things like that), but sunsets are different.  They make me smile and feel contented, no matter what kind of day I have had.  It's like nature's way of waving good bye for the day before darkness falls and a new day begins.

What is your favorite time of day, or your favorite natural beauty?

They just don't make them like this any longer

I was in an antiques store (known as The Collective) this past weekend, when I overheard a woman say to her husband  "they just don't make them like this any longer"  I hadn't intended to overhear their conversation, and I would never normally comment on something I overhear, but it so echoed my own sentiments that as I moved closer to where they were, I mentioned overhearing her and added how much I concurred with her sentiments.

Thankfully, there are still people around who appreciate fine craftsmanship - including antiques - and more importantly, there are still skilled craftspeople around to do it.  No matter how good a machine is at carving, nothing beats a piece of furniture that has been lovingly created by hand.  Don't get me wrong, mass-produced items have their place - and their price point - but I have a high-attention and appreciation for detail, and that, more often than not, does not come from mass production.  

Perhaps this is why when I go into an old house, I almost get giddy with excitement at the details that just are not used in more modern houses.  I love patina, and something that has history - even if I don't know the history.

A few years ago while we were in the Grand Canyon, my husband walked by the train station and notice the door handles.  He knew how much I would love them and called me over to have a look.  I sighed with utter contentment, and almost welled up with tears, when I saw the 'GC' carved into the knob and unusual shape of the plate - they just don't make them like this any longer...

Flop

Do you ever have a situation, that in your head was going to go well and be a success, but in reality was a flop?

I have, and, I did - this morning.  

I belong to a small networking group, which I really enjoy.  Each month one person does a more in-depth presentation about their business, which allows the rest of us to further understand what they do, what makes them unique, who their ideal clients are and how best to refer them.  It also allows us as a group to ask questions and give feedback on their presentation, their market/niche or their way of communicating what they do.  This morning I had volunteered to present my other company Rigore Rather than do a powerpoint presentation which is not my thing, (no offense to those that love them), I decided to do a quick exercise to show the interactive nature of our business and to give the others an opportunity to look at their businesses and see what is, and is not, working within them.

I was given 10 minutes to do the presentation, and as soon as I started, I knew it wasn't going to work.  I didn't have the time to really give the others the context for the exercise, I just jumped in, and they didn't respond with the gusto or opportunity (that I thought it clearly was!) At the end, there were a ton of questions, not so much about the exercise but about what Rigore actually does and where/how we could help a company.  Essentially it was a flop.

Not a total flop, as perhaps my inner critics would want me to believe, but a 90% flop.

Rather then dwell on this or remain as mortified and embarrassed as I feel (there is a part of me that would like to stick my head in the sand and that thinks 'these people must think I am an idiot!!') I am going to take this as a learning experience.

What did I learn from this?

1.  An exercise cannot be done in 10 minutes (it needs time to be set up, completed and debriefed adequately, or it is a waste of time)

2.  Run through either in reality or with a willing test subject, to weed out questions, problems or road blocks (because no matter how many times I have led an exercise, shortening any exercise does have substantial impacts on it's potential for success)

3.  I enjoy this group, so don't run and hide.  I do have something to offer. This is an opportunity to do better next time and others can learn from my mistake

4.  Some people just don't get what I do and I need to either do a better job of finding ways to explain it, or be willing to let go of those that really don't want to get it.  There are plenty more people out there in the world and those who have worked with us, do get it

5.  To have a ding in my pride hurts, but it isn't the end of the world

6.  Perhaps someone got a nugget of helpful information, that will lead to positive results for them

So, while I would have preferred to be a raging success today, I will humbly admit defeat and look forward to tomorrow with renewed passion and enthusiasm, because if there is one thing I am VERY clear about: I LOVE what I do, and I KNOW I provide value.

Friday's Quote

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face...  You must do the thing you think you cannot do.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt

You reap what you sow

Two of the 5 buckets of lemons that I picked this past weekend, waiting to be gently cleaned

There is a saying that goes...you reap what you sow...and yet sometimes I find, you reap what other people have sown and you have nurtured.  

Case in point, my lemon tree.  I didn't plant the tree, gosh, I am not even sure how long it has been on the property, perhaps since the house was built in 1947?  However, I now get to reap the benefits of having a tree that is fully grown and a prolific producer.  I do not believe though, that the prolific nature of this tree happens solely by accident.  I have no doubt it would produce some lemons if I didn't water it, or give it organic fertilizer, but I don't think it would produce so consistently throughout the year, nor anywhere closer to the amount of lemons.  As odd as it might sound, I feel a special bond with this tree.  I look out at it as I work from my home office each day.  I enjoy seeing the hummingbirds feed on it, the blossoms spring forth, the baby lemons form and change from green to yellow.  This tree gives me so much pleasure and I love it for that.  As such, I believe it showers me with lemons that are becoming a 'high demand' item with friends..in fact they are so loved, a friend sends boxes of my lemons to her father on the East Coast!

All this leads me to wonder about what else we get to reap that another has sown.  And I keep coming back to family generations.  The idea that my grandparents worked hard so that my parents, aunts and uncles could have a better life and in turn, my parents worked hard to ensure that my siblings and I had privileges that they didn't have.  In a strange way, I feel like I am reaping the benefits of both these past generations and the generations that came before them.  I also believe that the work I do, such as the work I did while I was on the board within my community will allow others to reap some rewards from the seeds of ideas that I planted, suggested or assisted in creating.  However, my inner critics grab hold of me and force me to ask myself the same question over and over again 'do I deserve to reap the benefits that others have sown?'  This is not an unfamiliar theme for me - do I deserve?  

I have to assume that my previous generations would implore me accept their gifts graciously and yet I feel guilty for doing so.  Many of them are no longer around so I can't ask them, but I think it would be worth my while to at the very least, to ask my parents.  That way, I could perhaps put this nagging feeling to rest and embrace all that I have, knowing others would want this for me and that I too will give things to future generations without ever needing to be 'repaid' or thanked.

In the meantime, I consider myself the guardian of my amazing lemon tree, and I will continue to love and care for it until we sell this house and a new guardian moves in.

A glass of wine

Last week I wrote about a good cup of coffee, and this week I wanted to take a moment to write about a sumptuous glass of wine.

While nothing may beat a good cup of coffee, there is something exciting and refreshing about an amazing glass of wine.  For me, the experience is often interlinked, and tremendously enhanced by, where I have the glass of wine and who I am with as we taste, sip, drink, throw back or throw out, the wine.

I have my favorite vineyards and tasting rooms - mostly in the Marlborough Region of New Zealand and the Napa Valley.  Both places hold wonderful memories and are very dear in my heart.  In Marlborough, Wither Hills is one of my favorite tasting rooms.  I enjoy their wine, however, it is their location and architecturally designed building that I LOVE.  As such, I make sure every time I am in Marlborough I take a drive to the Wither Hills property.

The photo above was taken by my dad on a trip when we were visiting family.  Wither Hills has a tower which guests can walk up with their glass of wine and look out over the valley - I love this view.

In October, while we had family visiting we went to Napa and had a couple of nice hours at both Mumm and Duckhorn.  Aside from the gorgeous weather, great champagne and wine, and tasting lessons from my sister-in-law (which was fantastic!), I loved the time spent with my family, the shared nature of tasting and the slowed down pace that comes with tasting wine.

I hadn't been to Duckhorn before, but I will certainly be going back.  The venue is stunning, gardens lovely and staff incredibly pleasant, friendly and accommodating.  It is simply one of the most relaxing places to sample wine - and their wines are fantastic to boot!

So, if you enjoy a glass of wine, be it at home after a long day, or at a dinner party with friends who make you laugh, take a moment to sit back and savor both the taste and the atmosphere that accompanies it, it is unique, precious, delicious and often, unforgettable.

Public Service

On my way to get a cup of coffee and fill the car with gas this morning, I happened to turn on XM Radio to the Oprah & Friends channel.  While I am not a huge fan of Rabbi Shmuley, once in a while he will talk about something that is of interest to me and this morning, in honor of Veterans Day, he was talking about Public Service and raising children to be of service to others.  The people who called into the show had me in tears.  They shared their stories of how they, and/or their families have served others.  The spectrum went from helping to prepare the food for Thanksgiving at shelters to a child who designed her own clothing line and then donated the money to the specials needs class at her school...it got me in the heart.

For several years my husband and I have talked about volunteering on Thanksgiving or Christmas - to give something to those who are less fortunate than we are.  Given he knows me well, he has wisely pointed out that while this is a great idea, it is likely to leave me in tears and and unwilling or unable to then turn around and celebrate the day myself.  I know he is right.  I couldn't go and volunteer in the morning with children who have no gifts and then come home and open my own gifts, it would just break my heart.  Instead, each year we have settled on donating money to the Second Harvest Food Bank.

As I drove I started to feel selfish and embarrassed at my lack of community service. 

And then I remembered, I had spent a year-and-a-half serving on the Board within my community and for years I always had at least one pro-bono coaching client.  Plus, years ago I spent a morning cleaning up a beach with a friend, which as strange as it may sound, was a lovely experience.  It was a gorgeous morning, the water lapped at the beach and as we picked up trash we caught up on each other's lives - I felt fantastic and like I had really done something positive for the planet.  Thank goodness, I thought, I do have a good heart and more importantly my actions are consistent with it - I do give back!

When I arrived home, I shared the stories I had heard on the radio with my hubbie and I choked up even trying to retell them.  We have agreed that we will look for some way to be of service next year in terms of our time, and we will continue the discussion as to how to contribute as this holiday season approaches.  

We all may have our own challenges in life, but there are those that are far less fortunate than us.  As we all move towards the holiday season, please give some thought as to how you could do, or give, a little extra, to make someone else's life a little more filled with cheer.  My experience has been that the way I feel about myself when I do it, far exceeds the gift I have given.

Thank you!

How much to share?

I was at a networking event last week, and the topic came up of how much personal information we should be sharing - be it on our blogs, our websites, Facebook etc - and I have to confess it is a question I have been, and continue to, struggle with.  

I love the blogs where people are very real and share what they are going through, their imperfections, their struggles and their inner voices that tell them they should be doing something other than what they are doing.  And yet, I have come to realize that I am perhaps a more private person than I thought.  On the Myers-Briggs scale, I am a big Extrovert, but on some other scale, I want to have my own private spaces.  Frankly, I would love to have a room where only I go into (and my hubbie sometimes too), but one that is not open for public viewing.  Where I can put my thoughts or works in progress, up on the walls and not fear someone looking at them and thinking I am weird or judging me.  I would equally love to have a very public side of me, where I am leading large groups of people through exercises that enrich their lives.

But the question raised, of how much to share, was an interesting one, and again, gave me pause for thought.  My advice for her was to share only as much as she really, truly, feels comfortable saying.  I am applying the same advice to myself.  Is there more I could share on this blog?  Absolutely!  Are there days when I feel like perhaps I have shared too much of myself?  You bet!

My guess is, at least a good portion of the concern comes from fear.  Fear that if we reveal too much someone could steal our identities.  Fear that people will think we are weird.  Fear that we could say too much and later be hurt with that information.  However, if there is one thing I am really clear about it is that I don't want to live in fear.  I may not be able to go back to the carefree innocence of childhood, but perhaps there is a middle ground that will allow me more freedom and less concern.

I'm off to go looking for that middle ground, I'll let you know what I find.

Friday's Quote

Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

A good cup of coffee

A superb latte at Joe's Garage, Queenstown, New Zealand

There is nothing quite like a good cup of coffee.  

The aroma, the taste, the warmth and the comfort...ahhhh.....

There is something about it that I sink into.  It is a ritual for me.  

I only have one cup a day so I make sure it counts.  No drip coffee for me.  I am a latte girl through-and-through.  My hubbie keeps offering to buy me an espresso machine, but I keep declining.  I like going out to get it, whether to a mom-and-pop shop or a larger chain like Starbucks (I know, some of you pure coffee connoisseurs are now cringing, but at least at Starbucks I can order my coffee exactly as I want it made) I like the engagement with the baristas, and that first sip for the day...de-lic-ious!

No matter your drink of preference, here's a toast to something so good it makes us sigh with deep, satisfying, contentment!

Hopeful

As a US Resident, but a NZ Citizen, I don't have the right to vote here.  However, as the results come in I feel HOPEFUL.  Really HOPEFUL.  Which is something I can't say I have felt about the politics here in the US for some time.

Tonight, here's to a truly united United States of America.

I am filled with hope for a bright future for us, our children and our grandchildren.  And I hope that my hope is well-founded.

Apple

I am a HUGE Mac fan!  I have been, since I was a teenager.  (So much so, my husband recently bought me this t-shirt!) Of course, I have had a few jobs along the way that have seen me working on a PC, but at my core, I have always been loyal to Apple.

Luckily for me, when I met my husband, he worked at Apple HQ in Cupertino!  So we had lots of Apple products around - iPods, iBooks, MacBooks, MacBook Pros, iPhones and more.  It was like Apple HEAVEN!

Did I mention that I am such a loyal fan that now all my immediate family members have at least one Apple product?

While we were in New York in June this year, we went to the 5th Avenue Apple Store at about 1am.  It was like going to our own personal version of mecca.  Ahhhh....the beauty that IS Apple was represented in even the structure itself.

And few companies package their items as beautifully as Apple - even down to the last details in the box.

If you haven't bought an Apple product ever, or recently, treat yourself, the experience is like no other.

Long live Apple, it's products, it's high standards and mostly, it's beauty!

PS - Did I mention the Mac TV ads rock?!!!!